I was just reading -- devouring -- a new novel by one of my top three authors and came to a passage that literally stopped me in my tracks. Like I had to just put the book down and think about it. And it's not even one of "those" books. It's a novel. Not a self-help book, not a memoir, not anything except a long-awaited story from an author I have loved for a few years.
The premise was a conversation among a mother and her two grown children. The much-loved father died two years ago. The daughter (32) had just experienced her first feeling of her father's presence and had shared it with her brother. The mother took off for an unexpected international escape soon after her husband's death and was back with her son and daughter. She told them, with great trepidation and blushing that she had "found somebody."
The kids, fiercely loyal characters, were both taken by surprise by their mother's announcement and the scene unfolded from a trite "was somebody lost?" to a touching realization that "the winner is the one who is alive."
What that means is that the kids were not being disloyal to their father by supporting their mother's new relationship. Their loyalty, by default, belongs exclusively to the living parent. To her happiness and her well-being.
That really struck a nerve with me as I apply it to Dad and his relationship(?) with Lynn. He deserves my loyalty because he's the one who is here. He deserves happiness and comfort and love. He is not -- I am not -- disloyal to Mom if he finds that happiness and comfort and love again. It is almost disloyal if he doesn't.
If WE don't.
We are here and going on and Mom taught us all how to love. And how not to. And how to relate to others and how to let others in and help and be helped. It is disloyal for us not to live out those lessons.
So, then I thought, this also applies to me in another way: if I am not going to LIVE my live, to the best and fullest and most I can, then I don't win. I'm not alive, so I can't. Incentive to really engage -- with my husband, my friends, my kids, my life. Because I am here to LIVE, and if I don't do my part, well, I can't expect the benefits of winning. I can't feel pride and happiness and accomplishment and joy and fulfillment.
Jesus said He came that we might have life and have it abundantly. That seems to play into this whole revelation, too.
Now it's up to me. It's time to wrap all those pieces up in a neat package and LIVE.
Look out, world. I'm here. I'm coming back.
Yea!
Thursday, January 5, 2012
Tuesday, January 3, 2012
Teenage Girl-GRRRR
She frustrates me so much sometimes. She just want to put forth the effort to do ANYTHING! I know that I am not the greatest role model, and my discipline is sorely lacking most of the time. If I think she will be whatever I am, maybe that is the motivation to do more and be better myself. I have often settled for mediocrity, but I don't want that for my daughter. I want the world for her, and I want her to want that, too!
This year, I will model more, better. For Riley. For me.
This year, I will model more, better. For Riley. For me.
Thursday, July 14, 2011
Banana Muffins
1/2 cup shortening
1 cup sugar
2 eggs
2 cups flour
3 bananas
1 t. soda
1/2 T vanilla
Mash bananas until smooth. Beat eggs. Add shortening and vanilla. Fold all liquids into sugar, soda, and sugar. Pour into greased, floured muffin tins. Top with vanilla sugar. Bake at 350 for 20 minutes.
1 cup sugar
2 eggs
2 cups flour
3 bananas
1 t. soda
1/2 T vanilla
Mash bananas until smooth. Beat eggs. Add shortening and vanilla. Fold all liquids into sugar, soda, and sugar. Pour into greased, floured muffin tins. Top with vanilla sugar. Bake at 350 for 20 minutes.
Tuesday, July 5, 2011
Chicken Meatball Soup
Meatballs
1 pound ground beef
1 pound ground pork
2 eggs
1/2 cup seasoned bread crumbs
1/2 cup grated Parmesan
1 Tablespoon dried Italian seasoning
Soup
1 gallon chicken stock
1 small onion, diced
3 cloves garlic
1 Tablespoon lemon zest
2 cup carrots, diced
1 cup celery, diced
2 cups pasta
4 cups fresh spinach, coarsely chopped
1 cup fresh basil, coarsely chopped
Mix meatball mixture and form into small meatballs -- maybe 3/4" in diameter. Set aside.
Bring chicken stock to a boil, add onion, garlic, lemon, carrots and celery. Simmer until carrots and celery are softened but still firm. Add as many meatballs as you want -- calculate how many people will be eating the soup and average six meatballs per person (and then throw in a couple more for tasting purposes). Low boil until the meatballs are no longer pink on the inside. Add pasta. Continue to boil gently until the pasta is al dente -- on the hard side if this soup will be reheated (not served right away). Remove soup from heat and add the spinach and basil. Cover. Serve topped with shredded (not grated) Parmesan and fresh cracked black pepper.
1 pound ground beef
1 pound ground pork
2 eggs
1/2 cup seasoned bread crumbs
1/2 cup grated Parmesan
1 Tablespoon dried Italian seasoning
Soup
1 gallon chicken stock
1 small onion, diced
3 cloves garlic
1 Tablespoon lemon zest
2 cup carrots, diced
1 cup celery, diced
2 cups pasta
4 cups fresh spinach, coarsely chopped
1 cup fresh basil, coarsely chopped
Mix meatball mixture and form into small meatballs -- maybe 3/4" in diameter. Set aside.
Bring chicken stock to a boil, add onion, garlic, lemon, carrots and celery. Simmer until carrots and celery are softened but still firm. Add as many meatballs as you want -- calculate how many people will be eating the soup and average six meatballs per person (and then throw in a couple more for tasting purposes). Low boil until the meatballs are no longer pink on the inside. Add pasta. Continue to boil gently until the pasta is al dente -- on the hard side if this soup will be reheated (not served right away). Remove soup from heat and add the spinach and basil. Cover. Serve topped with shredded (not grated) Parmesan and fresh cracked black pepper.
Summer Pasta
Lemon Butter Sauce
1/4 cup white wine
juice of one large lemon
2/3 cup heavy cream
2 sticks unsalted butter
4-6 ounces mushrooms
12 ounces canned artichoke hearts, drained
1/2 cup capers
1/2 cup pimentos
Chicken and Pasta
Boneless, skinless, cooked chicken meat -- I used the meat from a chicken I had boiled to make stock, breasts and thighs.
1 pound of pasta -- whatever you have. I used orichette.
Heat the wine and lemon juice over medium heat, boiling slowly until the mixture is slightly reduced. Stir in cream and simmer to thicken. Add mushrooms, sliced into small pieces. Slice the butter into tablespoons and add individually, until fully incorporated. Add salt and pepper to taste. Remove from heat, add artichokes, capers and pimentos. Cover and keep warm.
Boil pasta in salted water to al dente. Drain and set aside.
Cut chicken into bite-sized pieces. Stir into sauce.
Put the pasta on a large tray and pour the chicken and sauce over the top.
Top with fresh grated parmesan and fresh basil.
1/4 cup white wine
juice of one large lemon
2/3 cup heavy cream
2 sticks unsalted butter
4-6 ounces mushrooms
12 ounces canned artichoke hearts, drained
1/2 cup capers
1/2 cup pimentos
Chicken and Pasta
Boneless, skinless, cooked chicken meat -- I used the meat from a chicken I had boiled to make stock, breasts and thighs.
1 pound of pasta -- whatever you have. I used orichette.
Heat the wine and lemon juice over medium heat, boiling slowly until the mixture is slightly reduced. Stir in cream and simmer to thicken. Add mushrooms, sliced into small pieces. Slice the butter into tablespoons and add individually, until fully incorporated. Add salt and pepper to taste. Remove from heat, add artichokes, capers and pimentos. Cover and keep warm.
Boil pasta in salted water to al dente. Drain and set aside.
Cut chicken into bite-sized pieces. Stir into sauce.
Put the pasta on a large tray and pour the chicken and sauce over the top.
Top with fresh grated parmesan and fresh basil.
Tuesday, May 3, 2011
Cheesecake
I am a cook. I am not a baker. I don't like baking because of the precision required and the multiple ways to mess up something that is, most likely, required for some special occasion.
Unfortunately for non-baker-me, my daughter has developed a taste for cheesecake. She loves it. She thinks about it often and asks for it regularly. For her 13th birthday last month, she wanted a cheesecake for her birthday.
I bought one.
Of course I took it out of the box and put it on the special birthday platter and told her I had made it myself. So what if I did? When you fancy yourself a cook and your daughter asks you to "cook" something special for her special day, you do it.
As far as she knows.
So I must be feeling guilty about that because this week, when we got a notice about that same daughter's Athletics Recognition Banquet -- requesting last names A-H to bring cheesecake, I decided to really do it. In all honesty, A-H could bring cheesecake or pie, but I had a bad pie experience this spring, too, at my friend, Sarah's wedding. I wasn't really all that interested in "doing" pie again yet.
Never mind that "CHEESECAKE" was an answer in today's crossword and I decided it really was destiny. So cheesecake it was.
I started, as I often do, with allrecipes.com. I compared a few different recipes to find a common thread, variations, and approximate cooking temps and times. Here's what I came up with and it turned out pretty well, if I do say so myself. . . .
Heat convection oven to 325. Line a pan with aluminum foil -- this because I lent my springform pan to a friend last month and, though I have a vague memory of her returning it, I have no earthly idea where I put it. No big. The foil trick works just fine.
Crust:
One box of gingersnaps. Actually, I used the Girl Scout cookies that taste pretty much like gingersnaps. Since Girl Scout cookies are a rarity except for in January, I think I'll use gingersnaps next time.
1/4 cup butter, unsalted, softened
Run it in the food processor until it's crumbly. Dump the crumbs into the foiled pan and press down firmly. I used the bottom of a glass. Anything like that would do the job.
Filling:
24 ounces of cream cheese, room temperature
1 cup of sugar
Cream together in the mixer using the whisk attachment. I think whipping this part for quite a while is good. Lighter, fluffier = better.
Add 2 teaspoons of vanilla and a 14 ounce can of condensed milk. Keep whipping.
Add three eggs, one at a time, until JUST BLENDED.
One tip I got from allrecipes is that over-whipping the eggs is what can cause the the top of the cheesecake to crack.
Pour the filling onto the crust and bake for about 20 minutes. You want to pull it out while it's still kind of gooey and unset looking in the middle. It will continue to cook after it is out of the oven.
Let it cool in the pan, then lift it out and gently pull the foil away. I think I will top the part I take to the Banquet with canned cherry pie filling but the part we keep at home will remain topless.
My daughter, the purist.
Unfortunately for non-baker-me, my daughter has developed a taste for cheesecake. She loves it. She thinks about it often and asks for it regularly. For her 13th birthday last month, she wanted a cheesecake for her birthday.
I bought one.
Of course I took it out of the box and put it on the special birthday platter and told her I had made it myself. So what if I did? When you fancy yourself a cook and your daughter asks you to "cook" something special for her special day, you do it.
As far as she knows.
So I must be feeling guilty about that because this week, when we got a notice about that same daughter's Athletics Recognition Banquet -- requesting last names A-H to bring cheesecake, I decided to really do it. In all honesty, A-H could bring cheesecake or pie, but I had a bad pie experience this spring, too, at my friend, Sarah's wedding. I wasn't really all that interested in "doing" pie again yet.
Never mind that "CHEESECAKE" was an answer in today's crossword and I decided it really was destiny. So cheesecake it was.
I started, as I often do, with allrecipes.com. I compared a few different recipes to find a common thread, variations, and approximate cooking temps and times. Here's what I came up with and it turned out pretty well, if I do say so myself. . . .
Heat convection oven to 325. Line a pan with aluminum foil -- this because I lent my springform pan to a friend last month and, though I have a vague memory of her returning it, I have no earthly idea where I put it. No big. The foil trick works just fine.
Crust:
One box of gingersnaps. Actually, I used the Girl Scout cookies that taste pretty much like gingersnaps. Since Girl Scout cookies are a rarity except for in January, I think I'll use gingersnaps next time.
1/4 cup butter, unsalted, softened
Run it in the food processor until it's crumbly. Dump the crumbs into the foiled pan and press down firmly. I used the bottom of a glass. Anything like that would do the job.
Filling:
24 ounces of cream cheese, room temperature
1 cup of sugar
Cream together in the mixer using the whisk attachment. I think whipping this part for quite a while is good. Lighter, fluffier = better.
Add 2 teaspoons of vanilla and a 14 ounce can of condensed milk. Keep whipping.
Add three eggs, one at a time, until JUST BLENDED.
One tip I got from allrecipes is that over-whipping the eggs is what can cause the the top of the cheesecake to crack.
Pour the filling onto the crust and bake for about 20 minutes. You want to pull it out while it's still kind of gooey and unset looking in the middle. It will continue to cook after it is out of the oven.
Let it cool in the pan, then lift it out and gently pull the foil away. I think I will top the part I take to the Banquet with canned cherry pie filling but the part we keep at home will remain topless.
My daughter, the purist.
Wednesday, March 30, 2011
White Chili
Soak one pound of Northern beans overnight. Rinse, drain, put in large stockpot with seven cups of chicken stock. Of course, I think it should be homemade chicken stock that you had in the fridge, but probably that stuff in the cardboard can thing is fine. I mean, I see them using that on Food Network, so it's probably really fine. It's just not a big deal to make your own, and it's better, so why didn't you?
Anyway, turn the heat to high and bring those beans up to a boil in the chicken stock. Throw in some Celery flakes, salt and whatever kind of pepper you like. I go with a mix of white pepper and cayenne. We like spicy around here. Bring it up to a boil and then reduce heat to simmer, cover and let it go for three hours or so.
Sometime during that three hours, get out a saute pan and put a couple of tablespoons of vegetable oil in it. Heat it to medium-low while you mince four or five cloves of garlic and dice an onion. Toss them in the oil and turn to coat. Shuck the kernals off of four ears of corn and toss them in with the onions and garlic. The idea here is to bring out the natural sugars of the onion and the corn, so cook it low and slow for half an hour or so. Open two small cans of green chilis and add them to the corn mixture. I like to add cumin, dried oregano and dried cilantro, too. If you want to use fresh herbs, wait until later to throw them in. They tend to lose their zip if you cook them too long.
When the onions are beginning to soften, but before they begin to turn golden, remove this mixture from the heat. Put a lid on it and let it set. The corn will continue to cook a little bit -- and, don't forget, this is going to cook even more in the chili. Mushy corn is yucky, so don't overdo it right now.
When the beans are nice and soft -- with maybe just a little bite (remember, they're still going to cook another hour or so -- add the corn mixture to the beans. Add more broth if you like your chili soupier. Heat on medium for 30-45 minutes.
Finally, chop up about three pounds of chicken meat. Remember how you made chicken stock to use in this recipe? Well, this is the perfect opportunity to utilize that chicken meat. If you didn't make chicken stock (or if you've already done something wonderful with your chicken meat like King Ranch Chicken or chicken salad or burritos), quickly grill up a few pieces of chicken. Boneless, skinless breasts are, of course, the easiest. One big, whole breast is good. Add a couple of thighs, though. The dark meat has a slightly different flavor and will add to the richness of the dish. Cut the chicken into bite-sized chunks and toss it in the chili, along with all the juice that escapes when you slice it. Heat through, about 15 minutes.
I like to toss a cup or two of grated Monterey Jack cheese in, making the chili a little creamier. Up to that point, this is a really heart-healthy, low-cal dish. If you want to keep it that way, serve the cheese on the side, along with sour cream, salsa and sliced avacado.
On the side? Chili-Cheese Cornbread: Preheat the oven. Put your cast-iron skillet with a stick of butter in it in the oven. Take two boxes of Jiffy Corn Muffin mix, prepared according to the instructions EXCEPT use vanilla ice cream in place of the milk. Add two small cans of chilis and two cups of Colby-Jack cheese. When the oven is heated, pull out the skillet, pour the cornbread mix into it and cook according to the directions on the box. A little sweet, a little kick. Perfect!
Anyway, turn the heat to high and bring those beans up to a boil in the chicken stock. Throw in some Celery flakes, salt and whatever kind of pepper you like. I go with a mix of white pepper and cayenne. We like spicy around here. Bring it up to a boil and then reduce heat to simmer, cover and let it go for three hours or so.
Sometime during that three hours, get out a saute pan and put a couple of tablespoons of vegetable oil in it. Heat it to medium-low while you mince four or five cloves of garlic and dice an onion. Toss them in the oil and turn to coat. Shuck the kernals off of four ears of corn and toss them in with the onions and garlic. The idea here is to bring out the natural sugars of the onion and the corn, so cook it low and slow for half an hour or so. Open two small cans of green chilis and add them to the corn mixture. I like to add cumin, dried oregano and dried cilantro, too. If you want to use fresh herbs, wait until later to throw them in. They tend to lose their zip if you cook them too long.
When the onions are beginning to soften, but before they begin to turn golden, remove this mixture from the heat. Put a lid on it and let it set. The corn will continue to cook a little bit -- and, don't forget, this is going to cook even more in the chili. Mushy corn is yucky, so don't overdo it right now.
When the beans are nice and soft -- with maybe just a little bite (remember, they're still going to cook another hour or so -- add the corn mixture to the beans. Add more broth if you like your chili soupier. Heat on medium for 30-45 minutes.
Finally, chop up about three pounds of chicken meat. Remember how you made chicken stock to use in this recipe? Well, this is the perfect opportunity to utilize that chicken meat. If you didn't make chicken stock (or if you've already done something wonderful with your chicken meat like King Ranch Chicken or chicken salad or burritos), quickly grill up a few pieces of chicken. Boneless, skinless breasts are, of course, the easiest. One big, whole breast is good. Add a couple of thighs, though. The dark meat has a slightly different flavor and will add to the richness of the dish. Cut the chicken into bite-sized chunks and toss it in the chili, along with all the juice that escapes when you slice it. Heat through, about 15 minutes.
I like to toss a cup or two of grated Monterey Jack cheese in, making the chili a little creamier. Up to that point, this is a really heart-healthy, low-cal dish. If you want to keep it that way, serve the cheese on the side, along with sour cream, salsa and sliced avacado.
On the side? Chili-Cheese Cornbread: Preheat the oven. Put your cast-iron skillet with a stick of butter in it in the oven. Take two boxes of Jiffy Corn Muffin mix, prepared according to the instructions EXCEPT use vanilla ice cream in place of the milk. Add two small cans of chilis and two cups of Colby-Jack cheese. When the oven is heated, pull out the skillet, pour the cornbread mix into it and cook according to the directions on the box. A little sweet, a little kick. Perfect!
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